Think It Can't Happen?

Think again. The green police have struck.

Lawn height requirements!!!

Oh the humanity!

Although to me this is actually an anti-green measure. I mean, if you want to be truly green you just let your yard grow au-natural. And using a lawn mower means polluting the air with noise and fumes. That's just wrong I tell ya.

The premise of this new law is the same though...government interference into the private and personal lives and decisions of its citizens. The nanny state striking again for the good of society - whether you like it or not. Freedom be damned.

After all, they know better.

It's Not Charity If It's Forced

Reading a post on a blog that I subscribe to today...they mention that they are getting a refund check from their taxes this year. They also mention that they are one of those who pay fewer taxes and get more back in return. A pretty good gig if you can get it.

Anyway, he thanks people who DO pay taxes for the "charity" they've given. This line, more than anything else in his entire post, grabbed me and made me see red.

"If your income level is such that you do not qualify for a tax refund, I want to thank you for the donation that you have given the rest of us."

WHAT!?!?!

My taxes are not given as a DONATION for charity. They are forcibly removed from my earnings, often for purposes other than my choosing. I support the military. I want my taxes used for roads, fire/police, and community things like national parks. I do NOT want my hard earned money given to people who haven't earned their own

[By the way...Stew is actually very gracious about this. He totally realizes that his refund is technically not money he earned in any way. I get that. He is taking advantage of the way the system is set up and I don't blame him for that...I would too. I just think the system is broken.]

Our family does not make a ton of money (and are poised to make much less this year) yet we have owed money the last two years because we would rather keep our money throughout the year rather than loan it to the government interest free and get a "refund".

Last year we owed about $400 or so. Not a huge amount but still painful. And to know that there are people paying no income taxes getting "refunds" (aka welfare in the form of a tax refund) really chaps my hide.

I'd really like to see some sort of flat tax or at least a system where EVERYONE has a stake in the system. If everyone had to write a check for their taxes, instead of having it withheld from their paycheck, I think people would pay a LOT more attention to what our government spends and where. Maybe more people would realize how stupid it is for the federal government to fund things like the National Endowment for the Arts. Or public schools. Or the Post Office. Privatize them all. If you love the NEA so much, donate to them. Let the USPS compete for business. And let local communities keep their tax dollars and invest them in their schools...where locals know the issues and needs.

Instead our paychecks are raided and our tax dollars are allocated based on what some politician in a far away land deems worthy ... or where they think they can get the most political bang for OUR buck.

I Still Love My Toyota

Toyota is having a rough week. :)

And the government is piling on because they smell blood and are hoping that the injured Toyota will allow for Government Motors to move in and take advantage.

The thing is...even with all of their issues, Toyota is STILL a better company with a better product than GM or Chrysler. Just is.

I LOVE my Rav4. No, mine is not involved in the recall (it's a 2004) but it wouldn't surprise me if they expanded the recall to include it. On the other hand, I've already been through the sticky gas pedal situation and lived to tell the tale. If my accelerator stuck today I would know what to do and how to safely shut my car down without crashing or killing myself. Any GOOD driver should (even when I was a not so good driver, somehow I managed to survive the incident).

So let’s set the record straight about how a perfectly normal Toyota, or any other car, truck, or SUV, can accelerate wildly “out of control” with an even reasonably competent driver behind the wheel. Can’t happen. Period. End of story if the driver simply puts the gearshift in neutral (that “N” just above “D”) and safely steers over to the shoulder of the road. And if the engine races until you shut it off, so what? All you really care about is keeping you and your passengers safe.

Duh!

And don't tell me that if GM were having brake or accelerator issues that the government would be making ridiculous statements like 'just don't drive them'. They would be praising GM for taking action and letting people know about the issue, reassuring the public (and stock holders) that everything was fine.

"...Michigan Congressman Bart Stupak, a senior member of the House Energy and Commerce Committee, wants to hold hearings about how Toyota has handled the recall. Let’s see, a Democrat from Michigan who represents a government that owns a good chunk of Toyota’s automotive rivals. What could go wrong?"

Maybe it's a good time to buy Toyota stock. I don't think the company is going under and I'm sure that they will recover from this (eventually) and continue to build good (non-union!) cars. Since the government helped the stock plunge yesterday it is basically on sale. :)

When I'm ready for a new car I will be looking at Toyota, but I admit that this incident has shaken my faith. So I'll probably also look at Ford...an American company not sucking at the government tit.

I Think I'm A Bad Mom

Not trying to have a pity party or say oh woah is me or anything but I've really been questioning my motherly instincts lately.

Please don't misunderstand, I adore my son. He is so cute and his smile warms my heart.

But I don't always want to be with him. I don't always feel like entertaining him. I don't even want to always hold him. I'm often relieved to drop him off at daycare and wondering how I could get weekend care! What the hell?!?! I'm supposed to be raising this little guy to be a good person and eat his veggies and I want to pawn him off on a sitter.

How in the world do you entertain a 4 month old? They have the attention span of a gnat. He's got a little Jeep walker and that will occupy him for ... a nanosecond before he starts fussing. The other night I didn't even get to finish eating dinner before he was wailing.


My favorite time? When he's finally asleep! I'm the luckiest mom in the world to have a baby who has been sleeping through the night since before 3 months of age. I get bummed when he ONLY sleeps 8 or 9 hours in a row.

What the hell is wrong with me?

Why can't I think of things to do with my son that don't involve sitting glassy eyed in front of the computer on Facebook? When he was 2 months old he just sort of sat there in my arms with few complaints, and often would fall asleep. Now that he's 4 months old he doesn't just sit nicely while mommy studies or plays her games. He gets pissed!

How in the world do parents of multiple kids handle it?

Somehow my husband managed to make pancakes on Monday morning, while I was sleeping (I was sick all last weekend and Monday...and still am actually) and he was watching the boy. PANCAKES!?!?!

I can't even heat up a bowl of soup.

I keep telling hubby that he's clearly a better parent than I am because he seems to be able to get a lot of stuff done even when he's in charge of the crumb cruncher. I, on the other hand, feel completely paralyzed and trapped ... unable to even go to the bathroom without five minutes of thinking about how to do it without a screaming baby as the result.

Does it get better? Do I just not have the mothering instinct? Maybe I'm just too selfish. I get bored trying to keep him entertained. I want to go make jewelry or study or heaven forbid do laundry!

I have been saying that I do not want him to watch TV until he's at least 2 years old, and even then keep it limited. But on Sunday I found myself rolling his Jeep in front of the TV so I could get a couple of things done.

I am a horrible mother!

P.S. No actual alcohol was consumed in the creation of this photo! I'm not THAT bad!

What Have I Done?

Faith as small as a mustard seed...that phrase has stuck with me since I was a child because sometimes I feel my faith is indeed just that small (a mustard seed is super tiny by the way).

I quit my job several weeks ago...even though I won't actually stop working at this job until April 23 (my official last day). It was important to give my final notice so we could move forward and find my replacement (which may take awhile considering how many people have already expressed interest ... and the job still isn't even officially posted!).

Why did I do this?

This Guy!

And the company headquarters (where I work) is moving to Seattle from Tacoma. My current commute can range from 30 minutes to 90 minutes depending on traffic (that's one direction...the longer time is generally in the afternoon). Driving to Seattle will MORE than double it because traffic just gets worse and worse the closer you get to the big City.

I'm not willing to sacrifice that much time in my car (or on a bus or train) away from my family. It would cost me MUCH more just to work and I'd be getting less compensation (they are not increasing anyone's salaries just because we'll be working in a much more expensive place and it will cost almost everyone more to get to work). I'd be away from home anywhere from 12-14 hours every day. There isn't even a daycare available for that amount of time...a couple coworkers suggested finding a daycare in Seattle and commuting with my boy. Yeah, right, there's a stellar idea.

Even though the company isn't going to be done moving until December 2010 (or so they say, I don't know if I really believe it'll happen that fast...nothing happens fast here) I decided that I could not just wait to see what happens. I decided to take control of my future...

Well...let me rephrase that. I prayed very hard late last year and the only thing I felt called to do was quit my job. How freaking scary is that?!?! Our economy isn't exactly booming and God wants me to quit my job, which pays well enough that hubby and I are very comfortable with two salaries. We're not rich but we manage.

So there I am with this calling to quit my job (before the move is even in progress) before I have any other job lined up. In early December I met with our company's Aflac agent to update our policies. We've had the Accident policy for more than 8 years and have had to use it twice already. Plus I wanted to add the Cancer policy and add Marshal to our plans.

When I met with the agent I asked how she liked it and how the business was doing. And out of nowhere I decided that I could work for Aflac.
I had no idea what this would require. I've never held a true sales position (I sold Avon when I was 19, and of course I do hock my jewelry *grin*)...I've never had any desire to sell any type of insurance (although Aflac isn't traditional insurance). And all of a sudden I'm saying...I could do that.

WTH!?!!

Now I'm studying for my Washington State Insurance License exam and once I pass that (*knock on wood*) I'll start training with Aflac (hopefully I can do it while I'm still in my current job). As of today I am not even technically employeed with them. Talk about scary.

Even scarier...I'll be working for commissions. EEK!!!

Lord...are you sure about this???

There are lots of benefits, without a doubt...

• Working on my own timeline - and as much or little as I desire (which can be good and bad)
• Working near my home and not commuting every day
• Being with a company that I truly like and from what other agents have said treats their associates very well
• A flexible schedule that will allow me to be home with my son more often - and work around hubby's ever changing schedule
• Potential for an incredible salary in a time of economic uncertainty

The downsides are huge and scary...

• No steady paycheck...commissions! *gulp*
• Having to buy healthcare on my own since I'll be an "independent contractor" (we're looking to see how much it will cost to get on hubby's healthcare)
• Having to pay self employment taxes (haven't confirmed this one but if I do it's going to totally suck)
• Having to network and "sell" myself...something I don't know if I'm good at, but people have been telling me that I am

With great risk can come great reward. I just hope God knows what he's doing. Doing a quick budget calculation based on our basic bills and only hubby's salary......We'd be in the hole by over $300 before even buying any groceries, formula, or diapers each month.

Again, I ask, What Have I Done?!?!?

It's a little panic inducing (me being prone to panic attacks already!) but I am trying to take deep breaths and continue to pray.

Things that make me feel more calm...

• I've got a good bonus coming up that is approximately two months of my pay (a little less after the extra taxes the government always take out...bastards!) that will go to paying off some debts and putting into savings.
• My last 5 paychecks will go into savings accounts and paying bills that aren't covered by hubby's paycheck (and saving for daycare expenses for when I'm training and doing sales things)
  
• I passed my first certification exam with 88%!!! WOOT!
• I'm going to be my own boss (mostly)!

So while I feel a little insane (actually, ... oh never mind ... insert your own snarky comment here) I am excited and exhilarated. And terrified!

Marshal...if mommy winds up in the looney bin, this whole experience is why. :)

I Want a T-Shirt

So, I'm reading this article about Che (well, really about our ol pal Hugo) and how brain dead celebrities and naive teenagers think he's so uber cool and the antithesis of authority and I decided that someone needs to make a t-shirt with the famous Che face ... only with a bullet hole between the eyes. 'Cause that's the only way this monster did any good - being murdered like a coward while trying to flee the 'cause' he supported.

Why do intellectuals (so called) and celebrities think that mass murderers are so cool...as long as they're the "right" mass murders? i.e. Mao, Marx, and Che. Hitler isn't as cool apparently because he was just so damn obvious about his atrocities. Plus he lost this brutal war, you know.

My son is going to learn about these monsters. History does matter and forgetting history (or believing the white washed version that some lib-tard professor tries to teach) has consequences.

I recommend this book. I've heard the author interviewed a couple of times and have read his book (it's good, and not super long). Reading it at work (I used to work out at lunch and would read it on the treadmill... note the past tense) a coworker saw it and got all excited that I was reading about Che. Until she saw the full title. *grin* Then she stormed away in a huff.

It saddens me when otherwise intelligent people defend mass murderers. One excuse? "The people who tell these stories are just the rich ones who were forced out."

*insert cricket chirps and blank stare here*

Understanding

Anyone who has never felt depression or been touched by someone with this disease may have a hard time understanding.

While there is still a stigma today with having a "mental" illness, more and more is being discovered and treatment is readily available for most.

I have Bipolar Disorder. I really hate saying "I'm bipolar"...because I'm not defined by my disease. It's something I have...like diabetes. It's a chemical imbalance and the ONLY thing that keeps me sane is medication. And even then the symptoms find their way in to destroy my days.

Reading The Bloggess, she posted a link to a post she made in 2009 ... It explained the feeling of depression so well.

In the grips of a massive "down" I know in my head that there is nothing to be so hopeless about. My logic is still present. But it doesn't change the way my body reacts to whatever chemicals are screwing around in my head. I think my logic is one of the only things that has saved me from offing myself in the past. That and my stubbornness and desire to not destroy my family. Suicide really is a very selfish act. And again, The Bloggess has a great post addressing that too.